We all have our own battle. Your battle could be less or more heartbreaking than the others but the point is, no matter what you are going through, have the heart that understands others too. Remember, everyone’s having a tough fight.
I realized that not until you accept your life’s realities, you won’t be happy. It is the ultimate key to happiness.
What do I mean life’s reality? It’s the imperfection of your family, the cruel system of society, your physical attibutes desired to change, the status of your life, limitations and rules you are bound, the culture and norm which limit and judge you, talents and skill you never have no matter how hard you try, the wounds of yesterday that still haunt you.
They might forever be there; trying to drag your happiness down. Long as you keep forcing things to change, you will never be happy. Some things are unchangeable. And these are your realities.
So uhm. I’m having a quite different summer this year. Biggest thing is that I’m busy. My mind is preoccupied. Thank God for my internship. I used to hate summers. Not really despise though but I wasn’t that excited for summer. Why? I don’t get to places I want to be at. I get bored at home and I couldn’t go out as often as I want. I’m quite alone at home so, that’s relatively sad or boring. Well yea, we’re just few in the family that’s why. My mother’s busiest season on her job is during summer so I couldn’t really bother her most of the time to go out and see the sun. Plus, she has weak body. she couldn’t stand too much tiredness, long walk, or heat because of her health. Brother, however, is busy on his thing, whatever thing is he into every summer. Well now, he’s at law school and going to the office with mom. And, dad works abroad.
I’ve been quite dreamy of my summers. I really want to go out, explore, see things, take pictures, eat, stare at the sky, and laugh. I think I’m the only quite that type in the family so I couldn’t tag anyone along with me. Sana gala nalang din sila haha. Well this summer I had went out somehow, mostly malls though. Thank goodness I went to the beach with super fun friends. I had something very memorable this summer. If I could just linger at that moment, I would.
But anyway, going back, what’s keeping me busy is my internship at ABS CBN Bayan Academy. Its focus is on social entrepreneurship and human resource management–very related to my course. I get to do writing, interviewing, video editing, translating, and other office work. I’m having fun. And the most important reason I’m glad I’m having my internship is that it’s keeping me busy, 8hours of work per day excluding weekends. Then I get to stay at Manila. It eats a lot of my time.
Me, being quite alone, makes me think of things–that happened or I’m dreaming to happen. I get worried at times, sad, and excited. Basically, a hodge pudge of emotions. It’s apparent in this blog, ever since I started, that I am quite emotional. Haha. Sorry with the laugh. I just really did laugh while I typed ’emotional’. :p But yes. It’s apparent. With me, growing, I want to change of course, grow holistically. I used to be depressed due to sad or lame summers. Adding to that is all the things I remember or think of when I get stuck here at home during summer. Now, I feel that I’ve quite pass that phase, somehow. But I actually wonder if what if I’m not having my internship, would my feeling stay the same? Hmmm. Well I hope yes. I might not have the kind of summer vacation I dream of but I have to be mature enough to face things I cannot change as of the moment. Well, I couldn’t force my family to go out and have the fun time as I wanted it to happen nor fight with my mom just to let me out of the house. I got to understand situations. I know time will come that summers would be way better than this or the previous ones. I know. I just have to stay positive on that and enjoy what I have right now. Well, it’s fun sleeping though haha. And, watching? And this, blogging.
To others, happy summer guys. Enjoy! 🙂